I come across so many people who struggle with balancing work and family. It seems that work has become the priority. I was talking to someone today who works very long hours and has several children. She said that she wanted to take a few days off in the next school holidays but was worried about asking for the time, and that if she worked through the holiday period she felt bad anyway about not spending time with her children.
This person tried to make a New Year resolution this year that she would take a few days every school holiday period (and her employment conditions include generous leave provisions) yet still felt guilty.
Who do we work long hours for? What is the point of having annual leave, flexi-time, banked leave, long service leave if we don’t use it? OK, it is different if you have a special trip planned and want to take several weeks off so you hang in there and save your leave – that is a specific purpose. But when it comes to quality of life, what is the purpose of not taking time to be with the people you love and to do the things you really enjoy? What does that prove?
“Will this matter a year from now?”
Richard Carlson, writing in Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff
I am sure you have read, or heard of, the exercise that involves writing your own eulogy. If you haven’t, then it is very simple. The idea is to write down what someone would say about you at your funeral, what sort of person were you? what did they love about you? what special qualities about you will they miss? what made you so special? what memories do they have about you?
Hmmmmm……………….”Mum (or Dad or whoever) was a great worker and devoted so much time to her work. She left in the morning while we were having breakfast and was home just in time to say good night. Sometimes we had to go into the study where she was working to say good night because she often bought work home. I think she had blue eyes but my sister said she thinks they were brown and our brother said they were hazel”
What matters the most to you? Who matters the most to you? What do you love doing the most? What are you choosing to worry about if you are not at work? And what do you choose to tell yourself about who you are if you take time off work? Too confusing ????
Four simple questions to ask yourself to find out the meaning of YOUR life:
What will happen if I do?
What will happen if I don’t?
What won’t happen if I do?
What won’t happen if I don’t?
These questions are good to use with any decisions you are hesitating over. Try it and let me know how you go. I am curious about what you come up with.