The attitude of Olympians: how to have your own Olympian success

Just I case you missed it , the Olympics started the other day in London.   For all the participants, the Games are the result of years of hard work and commitment. 

Many people think that motivation is paramount, that it is what gets them there.  I’m sure you are aware of the term “motivational speakers” and how thousands of people attend events by these speakers, or buy books and other products to change their lives.  They get all pumped up, really MOTIVATED, yeah, they’re going to make big changes – wow!!!  But………………. once the initial glow wears off, nothing much changes. 

The difference is COMMITTMENT.  It is more important than motivation.  Motivation is great to get you, well, motivated;  it’s an encouragement, a vehicle of sorts, a bit surfacey.   It’s like a car.  It doesn’t matter what type of car you drive, be it a tiny little compact hatch or a Ferrari, because if it runs out of fuel you won’t be going anywhere.   Commitment is what keeps you going, it’s the fuel, the fire. 

Now I often use the analogy of Olympians with my clients when I explain the difference between commitment and motivation. 

Olympians don’t always feel motivated to train hour after hour, day after day.   Think about swimmers in particular.  They often start training in the early hours of the morning when most people are still in bed.  In the winter months especially, when it’s minus something degrees outside, they don’t feel very motivated every single morning to get up and go to the swimming centre.  The thing that really gets them there is commitment.  No matter how much they just want to stay in bed, nice and warm, the commitment they have to achieving their goal is what gets them up and to the pool to start training.  It doesn’t matter if your motivation wavers, it is your commitment that makes the difference to your success.  So many people give up when the motivation starts to drop off and don’t realise that they can re-create that feeling by staying committed.  Put it this way, if your car ran out of petrol would you leave it and never return?

I’d love for you to have a little think about where in your life you need to put in some fuel instead of worrying about what type of car you are going to drive.  How you can get more fuel and keep driving?   Simple, easy and it will make all the difference.

 

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Do you know how to be happy? Take a few risks

Do you know what the secret to happiness is?  The number one thing that separates people who realise their dreams and those that don’t is taking a risk.  Being brave, audacious, feisty, bold, daring, courageous, gutsy, spirited, adventurous, and exploratory even; there are many words to describe taking a risk. 

There are a number of reasons people fall back on to NOT take a risk and lead their ideal life, to be happier.  Here are just a few:

• Fear of failure
• Fear of the unknown
• Fear of rejection
• The need for certainty
• The need of approval from others
• Absence of desire to change
• Lack of confidence

Best tip – TAKE ACTION, and then:

• Allow for mistakes – you will make lots along the way, and probably need to.
• Look at risk as an opportunity to learn.
• Be prepared to ask for help
• Do some planning (not too much otherwise you won’t start)
• Take baby steps
• Reward your successes, of which taking the baby steps is included.
• Evaluate and adjust along the way

I read something the other day which goes something like this.  Go out on a limb – the view is much better from there and you are more likely to find some fruit.  Hmmm…sounds pretty good to me

“The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible”.  Arthur C. Clarke

Along the way, don’t be afraid to stop and take a different path if it is not working for you.  When I finished my life coach training, I really didn’t have any idea of what was available in the business of coaching and personal development.  I had a vision which was based on very limited information.  I wasn’t aware of the possibilities.  Once I started exploring those possibilities, I stopped 1:1 coaching to focus on creating my life and business the way I want it.  I knew nothing about marketing, social media (hey, I just started using FB recently and on a BIG learning curve), had no networks with similar business models to connect with.   Even when I started this blog, I really didn’t know what I was doing but I did it anyway.

Now, I’m investing money (yes, maxing out the credit card) and time to learn, to connect, to experiment so I can create a life that will be built on my values.   Yes, I am making mistakes – but who cares.  Yes, I will get knock backs and rejected –that’s just part of life. Yes, there will be people who will criticise me and what I do and how I do it – oh well, that’s more of a reflection of their lack of confidence in themselves and a lack of imagination.   Who cares if some people think you are crazy?  Whose life is it anyway?

Think not of the risk of taking risk, think instead of the risks of NOT taking that risk.

And, if people think you are crazy?  At least life will be more interesting.  So, what crazy ideas do you have for creating happiness in your life?  I’d love to hear them.

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The formula for happiness and success

This week the Happiness and its Causes forum will be held in Sydney with a couple of speakers being Martin Seligman and Sogyal Rinpoche.  I thought this TED talk by Shawn Achor would be a good starting point for those of us who are not attending. 

Enjoy and then please share with me what thoughts came to your mind.

 

 

What is success and how to get it?

I came across this talk some time ago and would like to share it with you 

 

“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?”

Vincent van Gogh

 

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Want to have a “wonder”ful life? Trust your imagination

I came across this “wonder”ful talk by Janet Echelman on TED and would like to share it with you

“Your imagination is your preview of life’s coming attractions.” Albert Einstein

Steve Jobs: Live the life you really want

A very simple message.  Just click on the link.

http://www.ted.com/talks/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die.html

So, how do you want your life to be?

 

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What nobody told you about breaking bad habits.

There is so much written about changing old habits and creating new ones.  There is also a lot of advice about how to do it and how much time it will take.  I remember reading something once where is was said that it only takes 21 days to make a new habit – really?? are you sure??? 21 days!!!. 

How many times have you started doing something, a new habit or doing something differently and even after a month, two months or even four months, you lapsed back into your old ways.  It doesn’t take much, does it?    And we all do it.  Then it is so easy to give up and not try again. 

It seems that nowadays there is so much emphasis on quick change.  And occasionally it does happen if you have a massive mind shift.   It depends on how much you want it and how much embedded it is in your unconscious mind.  Mostly, it takes time. The other day I was reading a book** I have had for a long time on yoga.  Now I am a bit of a long term on & off yoga person – I started it when I was about 12 and if you really want to know the truth, I’m more off than on – yes, I haven’t made it a habit yet.  Anyway, in the book I came across an explanation of the yogic cycles of time and the specific cycles of time it takes to change old habits and create new ones.  So here it is:

To change an old habit into a new positive one – 40 days

To confirm the new habit in you – 90 days

To allow the habit to become who you are – 120 days

To ensure that you have mastered the habit – 1,000 days

Well, I don’t know about you but I felt much better when I read that.  I realise now that it is fine to feel like wanting to relapse after a month or two or even three – it is actually normal.

A lot of people put themselves down when they resume an old habit after a few months but looking at the yogic cycles, it will take about 6 months to entrench the new habit into you AND approximately 2 years and 9 months years to master that new habit.  21 days does NOT a habit make.

It’s OK to experience feelings of wanting to give up, it is normal to feel like that. The trouble is that so many of us do just that – we give up, and too early according to the yogic cycles.  The easy way is to accept that you feel like giving up, but don’t buy into that feeling; think of it as hmm…. just like that chair over there, an object that you can observe without feeling like you have to go and attach yourself to it.  I mean, come on, how stupid would you look going everywhere with a chair stuck to you.  Accept that it will take time to become the change, and to be that change, unconsciously and easily.  In other words, PUT THAT CHAIR DOWN!!

It takes more than a few grains of sand to make a beach

 

It takes more than a few floors to make a high rise

It takes more than a few drops of salt water to make an ocean

It takes more than a couple of mountains to make a mountain range

It takes more than a few dozen panels to make the Guggenheim

So too it will take more than a few weeks to create your new life. 

I’d really like to hear what you think and what your habit changing journey is like

**Yoga for Women, by Shakta Kuar Khalsa . Published in 2002 by Dorling Kindersley Limited, London

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7 secrets to success

1/ Be true to your-self.  Decide how you want your life to be, find your values. What do you gain by always conforming to other people’s ideals?   

2/ Turn the TV off and spend more time thinking and dreaming, reading, meeting new people, finding new ideas, get that imagination going.

3/ Do something you are scared of.  Don’t think of it as getting out of your comfort zone, think of it as EXPANDING your comfort zone.    4/  Don’t over plan – that can result in procrastination, confusion and barriers being erected.

 5 Take action – standing still gets you nowhere, you need to take that first step and then another, and another……………. 6/ If you lose your way – ask for help

7/ Have fun & have it now.  What’s the point of waiting? A friend wants to do a trip down the Murray but is leaving it for many years down the track.  She said that she wants something to look forward to – the trouble is, the river may not exist by then (which looked like a possibility given the drought we come out of) and neither might she.

 I’d love to hear what you think

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Entrepreneurship and innovation: let’s start with our kids (and even yourself)

I decided to post a link to an interesting talk I came across on TED.  I thought it was timely this week as I am going to Bali on Wednesday for the Wealth Dynamics Academy (I’ll let you know all about it early next week when I get back).  

The following talk does not apply only to children, this appiles to anyone of any age.  Stop limiting what you can do and start looking for opportunities for you what can do, or even better, what YOU HAVE ALWAYS REALLY wanted to do.  What better example for your children and grandchildren   

How to avoid becoming overwhelmed by overwhelm

Overwhelm is one of those feelings that we have sometimes.  It seems that a whole lot of things need to get done and all at the same time.  I used to ‘do’ overwhelm in the workplace. I used to look at all the work I needed to get done, thought that it was all too much, didn’t know where to start, OMG what will I do now!!!??? ARRGGHHH

I tried to use time management strategies – yuk! – too boring

block time on the calendar to get tasks done (then something “urgent” would pop up)

send the phone to voicemail and turn off email (still had to find time to deal with that later)

I tried to write out a ’to do’ list – got too OVERWHELMED again!!!! COS IT WAS TOO LONG!!!

Bugger!

What to do????

Overwhelm is an emotion, an emotion that we can CHOOSE to have. Yes, that’s right – we choose it.  The way I got around the feelings of overwhelm was to find my strategy for doing that emotion. 

We all have a strategy for anything we do and any emotion we feel. I suppose it may help if you think about it like brushing your teeth.  Oh yes, we all have a strategy for brushing teeth.  Mine is a bit like this:

go into the bathroom,

go over to the hand-basin,

pick up the toothbrush,

pick up the toothpaste

flick open the lid,………………

Got the idea? 

So, in dealing with overwhelm, think about the latest time you felt overwhelmed.  

• Remember where you were…………………
• what it was that you were doing just before the overwhelm occurred?.
• what were you seeing?…………………………….
• what were you hearing?…………………………..
• what were you telling yourself?…………………

If you have a close look at your strategy for overwhelm you can learn to deal with it. It’s all well and good to try and find ways of developing strategies to break the work down, or de-clutter etc but our emotions are not usually experienced consciously.

Approximately 95% of our actions are governed by the unconscious mind. Developing a way to diffuse that emotion will be helpful in being able to think more clearly and find a solution. The road ahead will be easier to see (I really wanted an excuse the insert the following pic LOL)

“The shortest way to do many things is to do only one thing at a time.”

Richard Cech

So, do one thing at a time.  Uncover your strategy for overwhelm, one step at a time.

I trust that in the next 3 days you will feel overwhelm. When you do, acknowledge that feeling, and then ask your-self the 4 WHAT questions.

Oh, and by the way, please tell me how you went – I’d love to hear about it

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